Upstander Week
Oct. 17-21, 2022
Learning how to talk about feelings
and inclusion
October is National Bullying Prevention Month
National Bullying Prevention Month is an opportunity to reflect on the classroom and school culture. It is a time to examine best practices when it comes to creating respectful school environments that foster inclusion.
To help foster this sense of inclusion and respect, Adaire is holding Upstander Week to encourage students to be upstanders (rather than bystanders) and take an active role in changing the world.
What is an Upstander?
Someone who recognizes when something is wrong and does something to make it right.
Reminder
Students wear Orange on Wednesday, October 19 for Unity Day
What is Bullying?
The repeated actions or threats of action directed toward a person by one or more people who have or are perceived to have more power or status than their target in order to cause fear, distress or harm. Bullying can be physical, verbal, psychological or any combination of these three.
Here’s a definition to use for younger, elementary age children:
When a person or a group behaves in ways—on purpose and over and over—that make someone feel hurt, afraid or embarrassed.
Anti-Bullying: Resources
Anti-Defamation League
Stop Bullying.Gov
KidPower International FAQs about bullying
National Equity Project
In the class this week
K-2nd Grade
Kindergarten, 1st, and 2nd graders will be led in mindfulness activities the week of Oct 17th.
We will practice noticing not only our bodies but our feelings. We have two books to read:
- "Listening to my body"
- "I can do hard things" both by Gabi Garcia.
We will primarily scan our bodies to practice noticing and awareness, focus on our breath, and learn to use our hands as a tool to "Take 5" - a strategy where we slowly take five breaths.
Our time will be led by Adaire parent, Karen Alexander.
Students in grades 3-4 will
learn various ways to be upstanders in challenging social situations through stories and small group discussions. Students will be encouraged to use empathy for their peers while brainstorming solutions that address their social needs.
Materials we will use:
- The Recess Queen
- Spaghetti in a Hot Dog Bun
- Yo? Yes?
Upstander charts will be provided for the home and for the classroom.
Our time will be led by Adaire parents, Chris Morrissey Grubb, Mary Stephan, Maggie Wachter and Allie Reilly .
3rd-4th Grade
5th-8th Grade
Students in grades 5-8 will
learn about microagressions and the way that word choices can have a major impact on another person's sense of self and self-confidence.
Students will participate in a practical read aloud to help them practice identifying social reactions.
Our time will be lead by Adaire school counselor, Justin Frangiapani.
National Unity Day Oct 19
Wear and Share Orange to show unity for kindness, acceptance, and inclusion and to send a visible message that no child should ever experience bullying.
Students may wear Orange as a free dress down day to help share the message that we are united for kindness, acceptance, and inclusion.
Understanding Microaggressions
The power of words, personal boundaries and social dynamics is a crucial part of childhood development.
Naming the difference between microaggressions and other hurtful comments is a transparent way to support children in their efforts to be anti-racist, thoughtful, courageous upstanders.
Microaggressions cut across all social identities including race, ethnicity, religion, nationality, sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, age, disability status, socio-economic class and other important social dimensions.
Microaggressions
"Brief and commonplace daily. verbal, behavioral
and environmental indignities, whether intentional or unintentional that communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative racial slights and insults that potentially have harmful or unpleasant physchological impact on the target person or group.
Microinsults
Behaviors, actions, or verbal remarks that convey rudeness, insensitivity, or demean a person’s group, social identity, or heritage
Microinvalidations
Actions that exclude, engage, or nullify the psychological thoughts, feelings, or experiential reality of people who represent different groups.
From "Microaggressions in the Classroom" the Denver University Center for Multicultural Excellence
Unpacking microaggressions a bit...
"Where are you really from?"
"Your name is hard to pronounce.”
“You speak English surprisingly well.”
“You’ve done so well despite your background.”
“You don’t act like a girl.”
“You don’t dress like a boy.”
What Microaggressions can sound like
Like other forms of discrimination, microaggressions are based on systems and institutions that have historically privileged certain groups and disadvantaged or oppressed others.
Repeated exposure to microaggressions in the form of insensitive comments, a backhanded compliment and actions that exclude may increase stress, anxiety or depression among people who identify as immigrants, BIPOC, LGBTQIA+ or other marginalized groups.
Microaggressions are often not meant to hurt, but do cause harm:
Source content: On Our Selves, The Movement for Child's Mental Health.
Book Recommendations by age
Ages 4-7 | ||
I WALK WITH VANESSA by Kerascoët _________________ This a wordless book is about the power of kindness and its role in creating friendships, and how being the first person to do the right thing can help others to find the courage. | SOMETHING GOOD by Marcy Campbell __________ "Something bad" is written on the school's bathroom walls, and no one confesses (Readers do not find out what was written.) The story addresses complex issues and emotions and is an essential book for starting conversations. | SPEAK UP by Miranda Paul __________ This book addresses all the ways kids can speak up, not just for others, but for themselves and for what's right. The rhyming text relays specific examples of how to be an upstander. Kids are encouraged to "speak up" to stop hurtful rumors, to help someone feel less lonely, to tell an adult when they hear a "scary secret," and to join forces with others to work as a group to call for justice for others. |
Ages 7-10 | ||
_________________ A great read-aloud chapter book Wishtree, is a thought-provoking story about the contemporary immigrant experience. from the perspective of an ancient oak tree. The main theme of Wishtree is friendship. There are two parallel dilemmas in the novel that are both resolved through friendship and community. | FEATHERS by Jacqueline Woodson _________________ The story is about a sixth-grade girl named Frannie growing up in the '70s. When an unexpected new student causes much chaos to the class. Feathers focuses on the peoples' differences and the reactions of others to these differences. Everyone feels different at some time in their lives. However, some people are subjected to the scrutiny of being different long-term. | THE HUNDRED DRESSES by Eleanor Estes _________________ A tribute to the power of kindness. Wanda Petronski is ridiculed by her classmates for wearing the same faded blue dress every day. She claims she has one hundred dresses at home, but everyone knows she doesn’t. When Wanda is pulled out of school one day, the class feels terrible, and Maddie decides she is "never going to stand by and say nothing again." A timeless, gentle tale about bullies, bystanders, and having the courage to speak up. |
MIDDLE GRADE BOOKS | ||
THE MISFITS by James Howe _________________ At once hilarious and poignant, this novel is about four unpopular 7th graders who decide to run for student council. After years of getting by, they are given the chance to stand up and be seen — not as the one-word jokes their classmates have tried to reduce them to, but as the full, complicated human beings they are just beginning to discover they truly are. This book inspired a national No Name-Calling Week | THE OTHER HALF OF HAPPY __________ This immersive and beautifully written novel follows the story of Quijana, a girl in pieces. Quijana must figure out which parts of herself are most important, and which pieces come together to make her whole. This is a heartfelt poetic portrayal of a girl growing up, fitting in, and learning what it means to belong. | STAR GAZING by Jen Wang ___________ Stargazing is a touching middle grade graphic novel about new experiences, not feeling Asian enough, and friendship. It's a story about making mistakes, feeling so utterly alone, and trying to make up for hurting those we care about. Stargazing is about trying to fit in, finding friends, and our feelings of loneliness. |
More Resource Page for Parents
National Bullying Prevention month
Talking to your Children
Social Emotional Learning
Disclaimer:
This page was created by parent volunteers from the Adaire School Advisory Council Enrichment & Engagement Committee.
The contents on this page are designed to help families have conversations about feelings, inclusion, and acceptance. Content is sourced from leading experts in bullying prevention and social and emotional awareness.
If you have any questions or concerns, please reach out to AdaireSchoolAdvisoryCouncil@gmail.com or School Counselor Justin Frangipani.